Life Is Great

1. Rule 1. - The Boss is always right.

2. Rule 2. - If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1 .

3. Those who work get more work. Others get pay, perks, and promotions.

4. Ph.D. Stands for "Pull Him Down". The more intelligent a person, the more
hardworking a person, the more committed a person; the more number of
persons are engaged in pulling that person down.

5. If you are good, you will get all the work. If you are really good, you
will get out of it.

6. When the Bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking
about themselves.

7. It doesn't matter what you do, it only matters what you say you've done
and what you are going to do.

8. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.

9. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

10. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

11. If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn
fool about it.

12. When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.

13. Following the rules will not get the job done.

14. If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

15. Everything can be filed under "Miscellaneous".

16. No matter how much you do, you never do enough.

17. You can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work you are
supposed to be doing.

18. In order to get a promotion, you need not necessarily know your job.

19. In order to get a promotion, you only need to pretend that you know your
job.

20. The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for
everything that goes wrong